Coming Out

Coming out is something that almost every LGBTQ+ person has had to or felt like they had to do. For me, it was when I finally started to accept myself for who I am and that I was normal. I started by coming out to friends when I was 18- their opinions didn’t mean as much as my family’s and I knew they would be accepting, which they are. I then came out to my sister, just after my 19th birthday. She used to joke about how she’d love me to be gay when I was younger, so it was a dream come true for her!

The scary part for me was the parents. Throughout childhood they always told me that my sexuality didn’t matter, if I was gay, they’d treat me no differently than if I was straight. Yet despite this, I was scared. Despite knowing that they would be accepting, the ‘what if’s?’ started in my head. I dreaded they wouldn’t accept me, they’d treat me differently or even be angry at me. Thankfully, the best-case scenario happened for me and over a year later nothing has changed and my relationship with them remains strong.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone. Bi people often get told ‘it’s just a phase,’ trans people must go through many obstacles to live in their true body, some people get estranged from families and others get sent to conversion camps, which, for minors, has recently been banned in Germany.

Current statistics from Stonewall reveal that many barriers remain in creating an accepting society:

• Only around half of LGBT people surveyed feel comfortable feel like they can be open about their gender/sexual orientation with their family.

• Bi men in particular (30%) feel they cannot be open about their sexuality to friends.

• 35% of LGBT people have hidden their sexuality at work in fear of being discriminated against.

• Nearly half of LGBT students have hidden their identity for fear of discrimination with over a third of trans students receiving abuse from university staff.

• Over a quarter have been excluded by university peers due to their sexuality.

The results show that not enough has been done to end the stigma regarding sexuality and gender. People often like to describe the UK as an open and accepting country, but this clearly isn’t the case. Workplaces and universities must do more to ensure they provide and environment that’s accepting of LGBTQ+ people, education must be made more widely available for people to learn more about LGBTQ+ issues, and hopefully become more accepting of friends and family.

In an ideal world, no one would have to come out, everyone should be able to love they want without fearing what other people think. Sadly, our society hasn’t reached that level yet, so we should at least ensure that people coming out are given the correct support from everyone and aloud to live without the stress and worry from other people’s discriminatory views.